The “Are you a good open mic comic?” test

You go to a lot of comedy open mics and are working on your one-hour Netflix special. But are you a good open micer now? Here’s a test to tell.

You showed up to the mic on time. Congrats! Give yourself one point

You stayed for the entire show. Sweet. Give yourself another point

You mostly stayed outside smoking during the show. Whatever. Deduct one point

You left as soon as your set was over. Sure. You’re busy. Deduct one point

You stayed for the show mostly talking loudly with people at your table. Zip it! Deduct two points

You bought food or a drink or at least tipped for water. Nice. Give yourself two points

You didn’t purchase anything or tip anyone. Times are hard. Deduct one point

You brought people to the show. Awesome. Give yourself a point for every audience member you brought

All your friends left as soon as your set was over. That sucks. Take back half those friend points

Your set was funny and people laughed. You rock! Give yourself two points

Your set went over the time. C’mon. Deduct one point

You said something on stage like, “I’m so high right now.” Dude! Deduct one point

You gave feedback to a comic who asked. Great. Give yourself a point

You gave feedback to comics who didn’t want it. Uncool. Deduct one point

You stayed after the show to hang with other comics. Cool. Give yourself one point

You hung around after the show to hit on other comics and wait staff. Creepy. Deduct one point

THE SCORE

8 points or more — You should be headlining open mics

5-7 points — You’re a solid feature

3-5 points — Have you thought about hosting?

1-2 points — Comedy is hard

0 points or less — Karaoke is fun, too

About the author

Creig Ewing is a comedian and show producer. He has put on hundreds of open mics, showcases and comedy shows in the Louisville area. He has hosted numerous shows and has featured at The Caravan Comedy Club in Louisville. He gets a lot of seemingly positive comments on his comedy.

Author: Creig Ewing

Writer, comic, cubicle dweller. Louisville Laughs

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